I am the second kind. I don't typically fret or worry about instructions and manual, I learn for fun and want to know obscure things like what is the significance of the Book of Durrow and in what era was it was manuscripted, you know... practical things. When I purchase a piece of put-it-together-yourself-furniture, AKA something from IKEA. I don't look at the instructions right away, I will look at all the parts and see if I can piece it together myself. If there's snag, then I will desperately thumb through the instructions and redo the project if I have to. I realize this isn't the most energy efficient or time conscious way to do things, but hey, it's my energy and it's my time and it's my way. So naturally, even when I received books from my adoption training seminars and the "What to expect from your toddler" books I got as gifts, they were immediately put on the shelves for decoration.
I tried to read through some of the pages, thinking I will put some effort into this because a baby isn't a piece of $29.99 side table, but a real live organism and it's a whole lot harder to redo that project. I couldn't do it! I felt I had enough experience watching and experiencing little ones the last ten years of my life and I had the best resource of all! KCC counselors and my friend Mia who I can always count on for honest answers to my nonsensical questions. I didn't want to be that mom that read too many books on babies paralyzing themselves and their kid from experiencing a little dirt in the nails and eating a piece of dried up apple from .... when was the last time I gave him apples...? Anyway, the moms that knew too much began to think that their babies were in danger of contacting every disease and disorder coming and going through this planet. They were always looking out for signs of delay or emotional damage they may have been causing with their punishments, if that's what you call letting your kid sit on a cute little time out chair for 30 seconds.
I began reading a book that I received as a gift and I'm actually beginning to think that all of the stated emotional damage that adopted kids may have from being adopted is going to happen to J! I began questioning every cry and every quirky behavior, whereas before the book, I just ascribed it to him being a baby or that he's just a funny little kid. I'm not saying that none of these books are of value and we should have a book burning of all instructional resources for children, but we must consider them resources and not warning signs of eminent doom. I want to know all I can about being sensitive to my child and to be equipped with every arsenal I can get my little brain around, so that I can one day be a comfort to my child. However, I don't want to LOOK for any inclination and create problems when there aren't any.